Beautiful Blooms Require Work

Growing up my Mom had the most beautiful gardens.  She still does.  She cares for them in a meticulous manner.  She weeds them and ensures that no plant is chocking the life out of another plant.  She waters them and provides them with the necessary nutrients that they need to grow to their full potential.

My Mom really enjoys gardening.  She knows what it takes to make a garden grow.

I, on the other hand, would LOVE to have a beautiful garden with beautiful flowers blooming but I want nothing to do with the work involved in taking care of it.  The thought of being outdoors weeding and pruning and cutting and digging is not my idea of fun.

As Lysa TerKeurst says, "I want the flowers but not the work.  Isn't that the way it is with many things in life -- we want the results but have no desire to put in the work required?"  (Made to Crave pg. 35).

Now take a look at how you care for yourself.  We wash ourselves to ensure that we are clean on the outside.  Some times we even take special care in how we style our hair and we may even put on some makeup.  A splash of perfume and something nice to wear and we are ready to face the day.

However, what are you putting into your body to care for it?

Just like a gardener wouldn't feed their plants something that would potentially harm them, we too need to be aware of the "deadly" foods that we are putting into our bodies.

We need to be willing to do the work in order to cultivate a healthier version of ourselves.

I am sure that we all wish that we could snap our fingers and voila!  A smarter, better, healthier version of ourselves would appear.  However, we all know that it is something only possible in our dreams.

Besides, if we could do that, then what would become of our relationship with God that we have been so strongly working towards?  We may be a physically healthier version of ourselves but we would not be a spiritually healthier version of ourselves.

This journey is going to take everything you can put into it and then some.  At times it may even require your blood, sweat and tears.  But keep your eyes fixed on the destination that you are working towards.

I cannot say how long this journey is going to take you because for each person it is different.  I have been on this journey for almost 4 years and with each day I grow healthier both physically and spiritually.  I have had my set backs.  I have shed many tears and yes, there was even some blood involved.  However, I can see my destination and I know that I will be a much stronger person once I get there.

Food Diary: Friend or Foe?

Do you keep a Food Diary.  You know, that little book that you write down every little morsel of food that goes into your mouth? 

Okay, I will admit, it can be extremely daunting and difficult and horribly old fashioned, but you would be surprised how many extra little details you miss when you try and calculate everything at the end of the day.

A Food Diary can be a great way to help you stay on track in your journey and can also help you to see when, in your life, you are more susceptible to snacking on foods that we know we will feel guilty about later.

Earlier today I posted this question on my Facebook Page.  Mothers consume an extra 73,043 calories a year by doing this . . . . 


The answer?  Stealing food from their kids.

Incredible isn't it?  Without thought we are allowing ourselves to fall prey to the one thing we are trying so hard to prevent.

I know that I am guilty of this and I am trying so hard to not do it.  Regardless of how much my mouth is watering when I see those delicious and delectable Teddy Graham crackers on the table!

Now, a Food Diary is going to be of no value to you if you cannot be honest.  That means, regardless of whether or not you had a bowl of ice cream at 9:00 a.m., you need to write it down.  That way, when you look back on it you will be able to see why you are not as far along in your journey as you were hoping or if your eating patterns reflect significant events in your life.

So what are some benefits of keeping a Food Diary?  Well, here are a few for you:

• Accountability - have your partner or a friend look at your Food Diary with you at the end of the week to see where you could have been more faithful in your journey.  
• Increases Awareness - you are able to more readily see where those extra calories are coming from
• Calorie Awareness - a Food Diary might help you realize that you are eating too many calories at one meal and will help you see where you can shed some calories and more strategically place them throughout your day.
• Proper Eating - a Food Diary will help you realize if you are eating too much of one food group and not enough from another food group.  It will also help you realize if you are eating enough fruits and vegetables.
• Portion Sizes - a Food Diary can also help you see if you are eating proper portion sizes in your meals.  Not sure what proper portion sizes are?  Check Here!

Those are some pretty big benefits!

When I started off on my journey I kept a Food Diary occasionally.  I will admit, I was not always the most faithful at writing in it daily but when I did, it most definitely helped me see where I was going wrong and what I needed to change.  Plus, my husband would look at it which helped to keep me more accountable.

My biggest pointer to keeping a Food Diary would be to write down what you are going to eat the day before.  That way, you can just follow it without having to sit and think and ponder throughout your day.  However, make sure that if you do eat something that was not previously written down that you include it in, maybe in a different colour, so that you can see where you may need to make changes (for example:  you may need to add in more protein throughout your day to help curb your cravings for snacks).

Here are 5 tips from WebMD to help you keep your Food Diary:

• Write as you go.  Don't wait until the end of the day to record what you ate and drank.  "We recommend they write down as soon as they can after they eat," says Victor Stevens, PhD.
• Focus on portion size.  Practice at home with measuring cups, measuring spoons, or food scales.  And be aware that people tend to underestimate how much food they're served.
• Use whatever type of Food Diary that works for you.  It doesn't matter whether you use scrap paper, a personal digital assistant (PDA), or a notebook.  What matters is that you use it.
• Don't skip your indulgent days.  "We encourage people to keep records especially on days when they're tempted to eat," says Stevens.  "What gets measured tends to get changed."
• Cook at home.  You'll have more control over what you consume, and you know what that food contains, and how much of it you're eating.  That makes for a more detailed entry in your food diary.

Another important thing to consider when you are keeping your Food Diary, says Julian Hooks from Review that Diet, is what you were doing while you were eating.  He lists 4 important questions to ask yourself:

1. Did you eat in front of the TV?
2. Were you snacking while preparing a meal or cleaning up afterwards?
3. Do you eat while doing other tasks like reading or working?
4. Do you frequently eat as a social activity?

"These are most often times that we eat without even realizing it," he says.  "And more importantly, eating while we are not even hungry."

So if a Food Diary is something that you feel will work for you then I encourage you to start one today!!!  It may be another step in your journey to help you realize your cravings towards food and turn them into cravings towards God!

If you require a template to follow for your Food Diary, consider this one from Review that Diet.

I'll Praise You With The Dance!

Dear Friends, today I want to dance!

The sun is shining, the air is cool, and the skies are blue!  My heart and my soul are filled in so many unbelievable ways!

I can feel God working in my life as my heart becomes less troubled and begins to feel more at ease.

Oh how I want to kick up my feet and dance for Jesus!

God has been making my heart and my spirit joyful in a time when I feel like I could be discouraged and downcast.  Life seems to have been filled with many trials and tribulations lately but through God's grace I am managing to over come them.

Do you find that when things get tough and unexpected situations arise it is much easier to turn away from the journey and turn to what we think gives us comfort?  Do you find that the temptation to turn to that pint of ice cream or chocolate bar bears down on you stronger than before?

It does for me.

It is like every fiber in my being, everything part of me is drawn to those things that I know will only leave me with an empty feeling of satisfaction and an extreme amount of guilt.  I find myself taking steps towards the cupboard or the fridge where the the snacks are "hiding" only to snap back to reality and turn in the opposite direction.

Oh how easy it is, dear friends, to fall on our knees before God and pray when things in our life are going as expected!  Yet how easy it is for us to turn away from the great comforter and deliverer when we feel like we have been handed the short end of the stick.

Dear Friends, may I continue to encourage you to press on!  Continue to break down the mountain of bricks of temptations and cravings and turn them into a pathway of prayer!  Your rewards will be great!

Setback, Thrown Back and Picked Up!

There is nothing like an injury to make us feel a little less than adequate.

As I type to you all, dear friends, I sit with an ice pack wrapped around my knee grumbling to myself.

It is so frustrating to be laid up with an injury.  However, at the same time it is a quiet reprieve.

I will admit, during the start of this week I was beyond frustrated with my injury and extremely discouraged.  Here I had finally found something that I really enjoyed doing and was making time for and all of a sudden I was hit with a set back.

It felt like I had been knocked down and thrown back.

Many questions were flying around in my head:  How long am I going to be laid up for?  Will I even be able to run again?  What if I am told that I cannot run anymore and need to stick to something low impact?  What am I going to do?

You see, I was enjoying the fact that I could receive a very good workout in 20 minutes or so and I was no longer feeling guilty about being lazy.  I was able to get out for a run at least 4 times a week and I enjoyed those moments of solitude.

Now it was looking like maybe running would no longer be an option for me.  I still don't know if it is an option.  I guess that only time will be able to tell.

I will admit that I have "self diagnosed" myself as I have been unable to get in to see the doctor.  I believe I have a case of what is called Runners Knee.  It is extremely irritating and definitely not very comfortable.  It also makes simple tasks like walking up stairs quite awkward.  Not to mention trying to sit down on the ground with the kids!

I have been off from running all week.  I have been trying to be good at resting and icing my knee but since I run a day care, resting is almost impossible!  However, I have stayed out of my running shoes and have not gone for a run since Monday.  I was hoping to get out for a run tonight but I can still feel tightness in my knee and feel that it would be best to rest it for just a little while longer.

I have had to search out quiet solitude elsewhere this past week but I can still feel God speaking to my heart.  There has been an odd sense of peace the last two days.  To be honest, I wish that I could have heard Him speaking a lot sooner.  It probably would have saved me a tearful phone call to my husband on Wednesday afternoon!

I have been reminded that I cannot do things with my own strength.  I have witnessed God's awesomeness as I have read scripture, lifted my hands in worship and have quieted my heart.  Oh what a powerful, loving and gracious God we serve!

Dear Friends, an injury or a setback can be extremely discouraging.  However, it is important to know that these setbacks are not permanent.  There are other methods (even if they do not seem like an option at the time) and they can be treated and remedied.  I know that it is hard to see it at the time, but we will bounce back and we will continue on.

We just need to dig deep and find that motivation within us to carry on and be the strong, beautiful women that we can be!  And while we wait we can come before God with an open heart and an open mind and allow him to use our down time to quiet our hearts and reveal his glory to us!

I Long to be Closer

It would be so nice to be able to sit down and write to you all and say that I was faithful to my eating plans this week and not once did I waiver off of my diet.

That would be WAY off the mark!

There will be no denial here!  I will be honest with each and everyone of you in hopes that you too will be honest with yourself and with others that are holding you accountable.

Yet even though I wavered, I can be honest and say that may waivers were more like a slip off the road and not a huge tumble!  For this I will be joyful and I will give THANKS!

As some of you may know, I have been doing the South Beach Diet and it has been providing me with some good results.  Okay, I will be honest, AMAZING results considering the 21 days that I had gone without even dropping a single, lonely, solitary pound!

Unfortunately I hit a rough patch about mid week though.  I am not entirely sure what was causing it nor am I convinced that it wasn't a tactic from Satan trying to deter me from everything that I had been and WILL continue to do.

I just had one of those days where, from the moment I stepped out of bed, my heart was heavy and burdened. I am an extreme emotional eater and find that in cases like that I turn almost automatically towards food.  It is like a place of solitude for me.  Well, at least it had been before.

I found that this time, though, I spent in prayer before God.  I asked for many things that day:  clarity, understanding, power, courage and even satisfaction.

I cried . . . I pleaded . . . I begged.

And God provided.  Those temptations to eat were replaced with a heart that was earnestly seeking to Praise Him.  The temptations to binge on foods that I know I would regret in the morning were filled with a longing to want to be closer to my Heavenly Father.

I will admit that I had a tiny, little handful of Teddy Grahams.  I know that it probably was not the best snack to choose.  However, in the end I did not sit with an entire bag of Teddy Grahams in front of me and I most certainly did not go back for a second handful.

So for that I am joyful!

It has been and will continue to be a long, never ending journey for me.  It is not like I am going to reach what I hope will be my goal weight and say that I will no longer battle with food addictions and temptations. Yet I know that through our Heavenly Father, he will give me the strength that I need to continue on.  It is only through HIM that all of this has been possible.

As I write to you today, I am currently down 6 lbs and I am that much closer to my goal of being a healthier version of me.  I hope that God will continue to grant me a life much bigger than anything I could have ever anticipated.  It is my hope that "HE is not finished with me yet!"

What are some of your successes this week?  I would absolutely love to hear them!

My Running Partner is Prayer

Training.

I never thought that I would be saying that word again.  And yet here I am actively admitting that I am training.

Not in the "work my tail off to the point where I am so exhausted I have nothing left to give my family" kind of training, but the "let's keep this up so that I can accomplish this" kind of training.

There is an all women 5 km race held in Toronto in October and I am looking to register!  To be honest, I am actually kind of excited about it!  The last time I ran a race was in October 2007 . . . 6 months after I gave birth to Hailey, our youngest daughter.

I have always had a soft spot for running.  I cannot say that I am very good at it, but I enjoy it.  I love the feeling of the pavement beneath my feet and the way that I can just get lost in my music as I round the corners of the streets in my neighbourhood.

I love being able to plug into my music and being able to let go of the day.  With every step that I take as I run the streets of this town, I find that whatever stress I had about the day is being left right there.  Like it falls off my back and lands right there to be left behind.

Some of my favourite music to listen to while I am running is Praise and Worship music.  I love being able to worship and glorify God while I am pounding the pavement!  Plus, there is nothing better than hearing words being spoken to your heart while you are out there.  Often times I find myself in prayer as I run.  I know that you may think that praying while running is strange, but I find it to be a fantastic way to end my work day.  What better way to end your day then with songs bring Praise to our Heavenly Father and with the words of our mouth praising and glorifying Him, coming before Him and talking to Him as we would our own father or friend.

Plus, there are often times where I need to pray to ask God to give me the strength to finish that run at the end of the day.

Often times we tell ourselves that the only way we can come to God in prayer is on bended knee in a place of solitude.  How mistaken we are!  God wants us to come to Him in prayer at all times!  It doesn't matter if we are on the bus, walking to work or if we are out for a run at the end of the day.  When we come to God in prayer seeking forgiveness for our wrong doings and bring praises to Him then we are truly bringing Him everything.

Don't get me wrong, I am not denying the importance of prayer in solitude on bended knee.  I believe that this, too, is important.  However, we need to remember that God wants all of our prayers.  He wants us to reach out to Him and to talk to Him just as we would reach out to our best friend or to a loved one.  He wants us to talk to Him about our day.  He wants to be that listening ear.

So the next time you are out for a run or are on the treadmill or out for a walk, whatever form of exercise that you do, bring your day to Him in prayer.  You will feel the difference in your heart and trust me, it will all be worth it!!!

I Want to What?

Exercise is not something that I have enjoyed doing.  I will admit, I . . . Am . . . . Lazy.  Once I was done work and the Little One's had gone home, all I wanted to do was kick back on the couch with a steaming cup of coffee and a good book (or the TV).  Who could even think about exercising after working an 11 hour work day running around after six (6) Little One's and then taking care of the house and making sure that everyone in the house was fed?  The woman that could think of exercising after that must be one strong and powerful woman who is goal oriented and focused on the task at hand.  That woman was most certainly not me.

At least, at the time it wasn't.

You see, it turns out that I could become that type of woman.  I could be the type of woman who was up at 6 a.m. to start work and to ensure that her own two (2) girls were dressed and fed ready for school.  I could be the type of woman who spent the day watching six (6) Little One's, teaching them, encouraging them, loving them for 11 hours for the day and then sending them home with their parents.  I could be the type of woman who cooks a healthy meal for her family.  I could by the type of woman who could do ALL that and then think of lacing up her shoes and going for a run or maybe even a spin on the bike.

The longer that I work at changing my focus from craving food to craving God, I find that my attitude towards exercise is changing too.  I find that there is a desire to workout now.  I feel like if I don't workout then my day is lacking something.

Today was supposed to be a rest day.  I was supposed to enjoy my down time and curl up on the couch with a cup of tea, my laptop and a nice chat with a good friend.  However, I found myself walking the door after returning from leading a group of kids at church and wanting to lace up my sneakers and put a few kilometres under my feet.  So that is what I did!  I laced up and went out and ran 3 km.  Boy did it feel good!

There is something so rejuvenating and empowering about getting out with some powerful praise and worship music and putting some mileage between me and my day.  It feels great to work out the frustrations of the day that I had.  My head becomes more clear and my perspective on life seems to switch.  That is not to say that today was an overly frustrating day.  It was just a long one with a frustrating moment.  It felt good to have God speak to me as I listened to the sounds of the music flowing in my ears.

Dear friends, if you feel like me, like exercising just isn't possible right now because "things are too busy" always remember that you can make it work . . . if you want to.  I liked to use the "too busy" excuse all the time.  Saying that I was "worn out" and "exhausted."  However, now that I make the time to exercise I find myself more energized and more ready and able to tackle the day ahead of me!

Like the photo says, it doesn't matter whether it is a 14 minute mile or a 7 minute mile.  It is still a mile.

A Reminder About Why I Am On This Journey

This journey started off when I was reading Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst.  I have long since finished that book and placed it on my table beside my bed where it sat, buried beneath more books that I have since finished reading.  It was not forgotten, just neglected - like many other things in my life seem to have been.

Today I decided that I needed to pick up the book again.  There was this nudging feeling in my heart that I have felt many times over the last month or so.  This time, however, instead of ignoring it, I listened to it.  I am glad that I did.  I am not even done the Foreward and the book is reaching out and grabbing hold of me again.

My friends, let me tell you that this is one powerful book.  It seems like when I read it there are things that stand out to me that did not stand out to me before.  Like things are more relevant this time around then they were the last time that I read it.  Lysa has this way of drawing me in and pulling me closer towards my relationship with God.  Reminding me, ever so gently, of where I am failing and falling short.  Not to reprimand me, but rather, to gently guide me back onto the path that I was wandering very far from.

I would love to be able to write this book out word for word for you, but instead I will highly recommend that you go out and pick up a copy for yourself!  Please understand that while I use this book in relation to my food cravings, the same concepts that she speaks about can be applied to any other craving that you might have in your life.

Lysa speaks about the rich young man in Matthew 19 who comes to Jesus and says "What do I still lack?"  (Matthew 19 vs 20)  Jesus responds, "If you want to be perfect [whole], go, sell your posessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven.  Then come, follow me."  (Matthew 19 vs 21)  The rich young man goes away sad because he won't give up the one thing that consumes him.  Is this not like people today? Is this not like me?  Refusing to make healthy choices and live a healthy lifestyle so that I too can follow Him? Refusing to give up the hold that food has on me.

Lysa writes:

Jesus meant this for any of us who wallow in whatever abundance we have.  I imagine Jesus looked straight into this young man's soul and said, "I want you to give up the one thing you crave more than me.  Then come, follow me."  Suddenly, Jesus isn't just staring at the rich young man; He's also staring at me -- the inside me.  The part I can't cover up with excuses and makeup.  
"If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me."  Mark 8 vs 34
It's not an invitation to drag our divided heart alongside us as we attempt to follow hard after God.
With  Jesus, if we want to gain, we must give up.
If we want to be filled, we must deny ourselves.
If we want to truly get close to God, we'll have to distance ourselves from other things.
If we want to conquer our cravings, then we'll have to redirect them to God.
God made us capable of craving so we'd have an unquenchable desire for more of Him and Him alone.

Wow!  What a true eye opener!  These words spoke straight to my soul today.  Right where I needed them to be!  Getting healthy isn't just about losing weight.  It's about recalibrating our souls so that we want to change -- spiritually, physically, and mentally!

We need to ask God to give us the desire to be more healthy.  You see, shallow desires produce shallow efforts.  We cannot do this on our own.  We need to seek out a spiritual want to that can only be provided by God himself.  We need to stop trying to do this on our own and realize that God can give us all that we lack.

I don't know about you, but that fills my heart.  God truly cares and He wants us to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Him and He knows that it is not something that we can do on our own.  We just simply need to ask for the empowerment.

Neglecting

I have been so neglectful trying to keep this blog going.  I start off with such good intentions but find myself failing more often than not.

The sad part is, if I had stayed and continued with my blog then maybe I wouldn't find myself in the predicament that I am in now.

You see, I gained back a good percentage of the weight I had lost.  I allowed myself to crave food more than I craved God.  I allowed myself to turn to food rather than turning to God when I needed a little pick me up.  I fell back into that rut of eating whenever I felt empty.

Yesterday I found a very appropriate motivational photo that helped me realize that this will continue to be a lifelong journey.  It certainly helped me gain more perspective on things.

Wow!  I don't know about you, but that certainly made me feel so much better about myself.  It made me realize that when I do fall down, I need to pick myself back up and start again.  I need to understand that there are going to be obstacles and that there never is a quick fix.

Often I find myself wishing that I could just snap my fingers and I could be down to an ideal weight for my body and that I could be making healthy decisions day in and day out.  However, life doesn't work this way.  That is something that I need to remind myself of quite often.  If I don't, I allow myself to become too discouraged about the minimal losses and the tiny gains and I find myself in a massive downward spiral that rips apart everything that I had worked towards.

So today, my friends, I pray that you will find your motivation.  Whether it be a photo or a comment or even something that you have read.  Remember that huge changes do not happen over night.  You need to work hard at them.  Pick yourself up when you do stumble and know that you are not alone in this journey!