Beautiful Blooms Require Work

Growing up my Mom had the most beautiful gardens.  She still does.  She cares for them in a meticulous manner.  She weeds them and ensures that no plant is chocking the life out of another plant.  She waters them and provides them with the necessary nutrients that they need to grow to their full potential.

My Mom really enjoys gardening.  She knows what it takes to make a garden grow.

I, on the other hand, would LOVE to have a beautiful garden with beautiful flowers blooming but I want nothing to do with the work involved in taking care of it.  The thought of being outdoors weeding and pruning and cutting and digging is not my idea of fun.

As Lysa TerKeurst says, "I want the flowers but not the work.  Isn't that the way it is with many things in life -- we want the results but have no desire to put in the work required?"  (Made to Crave pg. 35).

Now take a look at how you care for yourself.  We wash ourselves to ensure that we are clean on the outside.  Some times we even take special care in how we style our hair and we may even put on some makeup.  A splash of perfume and something nice to wear and we are ready to face the day.

However, what are you putting into your body to care for it?

Just like a gardener wouldn't feed their plants something that would potentially harm them, we too need to be aware of the "deadly" foods that we are putting into our bodies.

We need to be willing to do the work in order to cultivate a healthier version of ourselves.

I am sure that we all wish that we could snap our fingers and voila!  A smarter, better, healthier version of ourselves would appear.  However, we all know that it is something only possible in our dreams.

Besides, if we could do that, then what would become of our relationship with God that we have been so strongly working towards?  We may be a physically healthier version of ourselves but we would not be a spiritually healthier version of ourselves.

This journey is going to take everything you can put into it and then some.  At times it may even require your blood, sweat and tears.  But keep your eyes fixed on the destination that you are working towards.

I cannot say how long this journey is going to take you because for each person it is different.  I have been on this journey for almost 4 years and with each day I grow healthier both physically and spiritually.  I have had my set backs.  I have shed many tears and yes, there was even some blood involved.  However, I can see my destination and I know that I will be a much stronger person once I get there.

My Knight In Shining Armor

I have been busy reading Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst again as I find myself having lots and lots of downtime due to my knee issues.

I came across the following quote and was amazed at how much it resonated deep within me (yet again!):

But I did need to make changes.  I knew it.  Because this wasn't really about the scale or what clothing size I was; it was this battle that raged in my heart.  (Lysa TerKeurst, Made to Crave, pg. 28)

Dear Friends, this battle has been raging strong lately in my heart.  Not being able to be physically active has left me with this sort of empty feeling.

I know that I have not been faithful in my journey as of late.  I know that I have allowed myself to occasionally turn to food before I have turned to God.

Let me be clear, it is not like I have forgotten my journey.  That is always at the forefront of my mind.  However, I realize that I am merely human and that I do slip up from time to time.

Does this excuse it?  Definitely NOT!  However, it most certainly helps me learn from it.

Lysa TerKeurst refers to her battle as a mountain.  As she continues to bring her battles and struggles with food to God and turn to Him, she removes bricks from her mountain and turns it into a pathway to prayer.

This does not mean that we will not struggle!

However, it gives us faith to know that the more we continue to press on in our journey to become women who crave God and NOT food that we are building our pathway to a greater and deeper relationship with our Heavenly Father.

I know that this post has taken a long time to be written.  I started writing and then would delete it.  Started and then delete.  Time and time again I have been trying to find the right words to write down.

My struggle runs deep . . . daily.  The more I find circumstances pressing in on me the more I find it increasingly harder to turn and give all that I have and all that I am to our God.

Dear Friends, if you are struggling please know that I lift you up daily in constant prayer.  You are not alone in this journey.

I know that I am comforted in the fact that God is carrying me in his arms as I write this.  I would be so lost if I did not have the love of our Heavenly Father and the faith to know that He will continue to wage war for me in my battles.

He is my knight in shining armor!  Riding forth on his valiant steed with sword raised and shield readied to fight for me.

How comforting!

We serve a great and glorious king and I am reminded of this daily.  My prayer is that you, too, will know just how mighty and powerful and great of a God we serve and that you will learn to pour all that you have and all that you are into an everlasting and deep relationship with Him.

Power to Resist Temptations

Wouldn't it be nice if all of our temptations were as easily visible as this?

It would make things so much easier wouldn't it?

I can see it now.  Sitting on the couch watching a movie and this big orange fuzzy monster comes walking in with chips and popcorn.  How much easier it would be for me to say no to that!

Yet our temptations are not as easily visible to us or to others.

Earlier I wrote a post titled Turning Your Cravings into Blessings.  Here I urged you to do battle against your temptations with scripture and prayer.  

Some of you have expressed how difficult it is to fight off your temptations.  I can definitely relate to this!  Temptations for food have a way of getting under our skin, into our entire being!  We can taste them, see them, touch them . . . . and it breaks us.

Temptations appear in many forms for many different people.  Most of you that read my blog struggle with the same temptations towards foods that I do.

We are bombarded daily by ads in magazines, commercials on the television, pictures that we see on the internet.  All of these images ignite in us a desire, a craving, to consume foods that we know will leave us with a deep sense of dread and guilt if we allow ourselves to indulge.

It consumes us.  

Yet we have the power within us to fight off these temptations.  We just may not know it yet.

When we turn to God in our deepest time of craving and wanting we are slowly retraining our minds to crave a higher power than that of food.  When we take the time to fervently ask God to help us break down the hold that temptations have on us we are striving to deepen our relationship with the One we should crave daily.

God provides us with the tools we need to overcome our temptations if we merely ask Him for them.

Don't get me wrong, dear friends.  I know that we think it cannot be as simple as that.  I have found myself in my room, curled up on my bed, tears streaming down my face as I fight off the urge to binge on foods that I know will leave me with an even deeper emptiness than before.  

If we seek out God during our times of despair He will answer us.  

We are designed, made, fashioned, created to crave.  Yet not what our body desires but what our heart and soul desire.  A true, deep, desire for a relationship with God.  

Here are some Healthy Eating Go-To Scripts from Lysa TerKeurst.  Dear friends, when you find yourself reaching for those irresistible temptations, turn to the One who can give you the strength to move past them.  Read the passages provided, pray, cry if you need to.  Know that this is not a battle that you need to face on your own.  We have a Creator who wants to do battle for us.

My favourite scripture passages to help resist temptation is:

No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind.  And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.  But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.  1 Corinthians 10 vs 13

"He will provide a way out so that you can endure it."  Dear friends, this brings me comfort.  To know that if I ask, He will provide me with a way out so that I can endure it.

You are not alone.  You are walking with your Heavenly Father.  Call out to Him in your times of struggle and He will help you find rest.

The First Story of Temptation

I find it interesting when reading my Bible that Eve had the first interaction recorded in the Bible between woman and food.  Now, let me be honest with you, this is not information that I came across all on my own.  This was something that was pointed out to me through Made to Crave.  When I read the story my mind can't get past why Satan tempted Eve first.  However, to think that this craving food issue has been around since the beginning is almost unreal!  When looking at the story of The Fall we cannot ignore the fact that the Serpent used food as a tool.  If the very downfall of humanity was caused when Eve surrendered to a temptation to eat something that she wasn't supposed to eat, I do think our struggles with food are important to God. (Lysa TerKeurst Made To Crave)

That temptation that Eve was facing must have been an extremely difficult one.  I am not saying that she was as tempted as I am to sit down with that Lindt chocolate bunny that is sitting on my counter.  What I am saying is that there must have been a very strong draw for her towards that food.  Satan doesn't chose what he uses to tempts us lightly.  There is reasoning behind it.  He knows what we crave, what draws us, he knows where we are weak.

So now what?  Do you find yourself less drawn to that bag of chips in the cupboard or, like me, the Lindt Chocolate Bunny on the counter?  Does it make you look at things a little differently?  It allows me to be reminded that Satan is going to hit me at my weakest points day in and day out.  Every hour of every day he will be there to draw me away from what matters most -- my relationship with God.

It is interesting when I think back on when I am tempted the most with unhealthy food choices.  It is more than likely when I am near or around something that triggers my cravings.  Fast food restaurants, snacks on the table while watching a movie, going to gatherings at friends' houses . . . these places are all open areas where I cannot hide from my temptations.

So the question arises:  what do I do?  I cannot stop going to friends' houses and I do not want to stop watching movies at home with my family.  Fast food restaurants are inevitable as they are everywhere.  So do I allow my temptations to win me over instead of filling myself up on all the wholeness and goodness that our Heavenly Father has to offer?  To I throw away everything that I have worked towards just because it is what is easiest?

God never said that things would be easy.  He never said that if we are to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Him that our burdens would be light.  If I want to have a closer relationship with God and if I want to stop allowing my cravings for food to draw me away from Him, then I need to plant my feet firmly in the word and know that through Him, all things are possible.

So when I go to my friends' house I will stand firm and allow myself to only eat vegetables.  When I watch movies with my family I will make healthier choices and reach for that air popped popcorn instead of those greasy, salty chips.  And Fast Food restaurants?  Well, I will do everything in my power to avoid them.  Even if it means packing a lunch from home!  If that's not possible?  Then I will make healthy choices and opt for a wrap or salad instead of hamburger and fries.

My dear friends, we are never alone when we battle with Satan.  God is always there with us and He will stand firm with us.  We only need to ask.

A Reminder About Why I Am On This Journey

This journey started off when I was reading Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst.  I have long since finished that book and placed it on my table beside my bed where it sat, buried beneath more books that I have since finished reading.  It was not forgotten, just neglected - like many other things in my life seem to have been.

Today I decided that I needed to pick up the book again.  There was this nudging feeling in my heart that I have felt many times over the last month or so.  This time, however, instead of ignoring it, I listened to it.  I am glad that I did.  I am not even done the Foreward and the book is reaching out and grabbing hold of me again.

My friends, let me tell you that this is one powerful book.  It seems like when I read it there are things that stand out to me that did not stand out to me before.  Like things are more relevant this time around then they were the last time that I read it.  Lysa has this way of drawing me in and pulling me closer towards my relationship with God.  Reminding me, ever so gently, of where I am failing and falling short.  Not to reprimand me, but rather, to gently guide me back onto the path that I was wandering very far from.

I would love to be able to write this book out word for word for you, but instead I will highly recommend that you go out and pick up a copy for yourself!  Please understand that while I use this book in relation to my food cravings, the same concepts that she speaks about can be applied to any other craving that you might have in your life.

Lysa speaks about the rich young man in Matthew 19 who comes to Jesus and says "What do I still lack?"  (Matthew 19 vs 20)  Jesus responds, "If you want to be perfect [whole], go, sell your posessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven.  Then come, follow me."  (Matthew 19 vs 21)  The rich young man goes away sad because he won't give up the one thing that consumes him.  Is this not like people today? Is this not like me?  Refusing to make healthy choices and live a healthy lifestyle so that I too can follow Him? Refusing to give up the hold that food has on me.

Lysa writes:

Jesus meant this for any of us who wallow in whatever abundance we have.  I imagine Jesus looked straight into this young man's soul and said, "I want you to give up the one thing you crave more than me.  Then come, follow me."  Suddenly, Jesus isn't just staring at the rich young man; He's also staring at me -- the inside me.  The part I can't cover up with excuses and makeup.  
"If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me."  Mark 8 vs 34
It's not an invitation to drag our divided heart alongside us as we attempt to follow hard after God.
With  Jesus, if we want to gain, we must give up.
If we want to be filled, we must deny ourselves.
If we want to truly get close to God, we'll have to distance ourselves from other things.
If we want to conquer our cravings, then we'll have to redirect them to God.
God made us capable of craving so we'd have an unquenchable desire for more of Him and Him alone.

Wow!  What a true eye opener!  These words spoke straight to my soul today.  Right where I needed them to be!  Getting healthy isn't just about losing weight.  It's about recalibrating our souls so that we want to change -- spiritually, physically, and mentally!

We need to ask God to give us the desire to be more healthy.  You see, shallow desires produce shallow efforts.  We cannot do this on our own.  We need to seek out a spiritual want to that can only be provided by God himself.  We need to stop trying to do this on our own and realize that God can give us all that we lack.

I don't know about you, but that fills my heart.  God truly cares and He wants us to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Him and He knows that it is not something that we can do on our own.  We just simply need to ask for the empowerment.

Life Cafe

Tonight was more than I could have asked for.  It was a heaven sent blessing, that's for sure.

Life Cafe is our church's version of Coffee Break.  It is for women of all walks of faith that includes time of fellowship, laughter, fun and study.  The best part, is that it is held both in the morning and in the evening.  A perfect way to include everyone if you ask me!  It allows those that work during the day to have the opportunity to be part of something great, too!

I have been given the privilege to lead a handful of these women in Lysa TerKeurst's Made to Crave study and I could not be more joyous!  Oh how my heart was full as I was able to share with them not only my own personal struggles, but also something that has helped to reach out and touch my heart.

As you know, Made to Crave has been a God send in my life.  It has not only been an eye opening read, but has been a helpful aide in bringing me to a place where I can now acknowledge that my addiction to food has been controlling me for far too long.

To be able to reach out to these women and share with them my struggles (that are, I might add, continuous and ongoing) and to say that there is help was more than I could have asked for.

We truly serve an awesome, amazing, wonderful, loving God.  I never knew that starting this journey would take me down this path, but I feel blessed knowing that He wants me to do this.

When I started out, I truly thought that this would be a personal struggle that I would deal with on my own and with God.  I never thought that I would have the opportunity to share this and speak so openly about this topic with other women who feel the same way I do.  I felt that I truly was alone when it came to how I felt.  It almost feels like a breath of fresh air to know that I am not alone.

Now don't get me wrong, my heart aches for women who feel the way that I do and my soul cries out for them as I lift them up in prayer.  I don't wish these feelings on anyone.  Yet to know that God wants to use me, plain old broken messed up me, to help others is amazing.  Even better though, it is humbling.

Dear friends, I plead with you to pray for me.  Pray that I will have the right words to say at the right time.  Pray that I will be silent when He calls me to be silent.  Pray that God will guide our study together and that He will use me to bring light to others who are struggling.

"My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."  ~ Psalm 73 verse 26

Let The Journey Begin!

Weight has always been a constant struggle since the birth of my two beautiful daughters.  Throughout pregnancy I gained a lot of weight.  We are talking close to 80 pounds from the start of my pregnancy to the end.  I have struggled with the realization that I am not just overweight, but rather, obese.  Hearing that sends shudders through my body.

However, this journey is not about what the numbers read on the scale.  It is not about reaching the "lowest weight possible" or even about becoming a size 6.  This journey is about realizing that I am more than just those numbers on the scale.  That my worth is not made up by the size of my pants.  This journey is coming to the realization that I am made for more than this.

I will admit, I am a weigh scale junkie.  I can be found each morning stepping on the scale hoping beyond hope that somehow those numbers will be lower than the morning before.  I stand tall and proud only to be defeated each and every single day.  I step off the scale only to step back on hoping that maybe, just maybe, it was wrong the first time around.  No such luck.  I am Defeated.

Starting your day off in this manner is extremely difficult.  Sometimes I feel like I have to scrape myself off of the bathroom floor just so that I can pull myself together enough to get through the day.  This feeling?  It sucks.

Food is a constant battle for me.  Unhealthy choices face me each and every single day.  One would think that  working in the home would make it easy to make smart, healthy choices.  Well, it's not easy.  That ice cream in the freezer?  It is screaming my name.  Those Crispers in the cupboard?  They taunt me each and every time I walk past them.

I know what you're thinking: "Are you kidding me?"  The truth is, food has become like an addiction to me.  I eat when I am sad, I eat when I'm bored, I eat when I am happy, I eat . . . . Well, you get the idea.  I honestly can find almost any reason to eat.  After I satisfy my cravings I come up with a list of excuses to make it all seem okay: "I'll start making healthier choices tomorrow;" "just a little indulgence doesn't hurt;" "I deserve a little treat."

I'm tired of making excuses.  I am tired of waking up in the morning thinking "today is going to be a new day!" only to fall short of my ambitions and goals once again.  I am tired of letting food rule my life.

I have started reading the book Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst.  For those of you who are in a situation similar to me or feel the way I do, may I strongly recommend this book.  Lysa is speaking directly to me as I read each page.  She is a Christian author who hits the nail on the head when she says that we need to replace our food cravings with cravings for God.

So here I start my journey.  I am hoping that you will come along with me.  I will hold you accountable if you will do the same for me.

Craving isn't a bad thing; as long as what you are craving is a desire to be closer to God, not that Rocky Road Ice Cream sitting in your freezer.