It's Not Fair!

I think that I have said "It's not fair!" to myself more times then I can count.  I know that I have cried in my room on more than one occasion thinking that it's not fair that I look the way I do or that I feel the way I do.  It's not fair that I have this struggle with food and this constant feeling of "want."

Have you ever walked through your local grocery store and peeked at what items were in another person's grocery cart as you walked passed them?  I have.  In fact, I catch myself doing it all the time.  I don't know why I do it either.  I leave the grocery store feeling jealous and envious of others.  Why can't I look like her?

As I was reading Made to Crave last night, Lysa TerKeurst had an entire chapter written on this very topic.  Satan tempts us in so many ways.  He creates feelings of self-doubt in order to bring us further away from God.  He takes pleasure in knowing the exact words to say so that our sinful desires keep us away from building up our relationship with our heavenly Father.  How many times have I cried to my husband thinking that it's not fair that I can't look and feel good in a simple pair of jeans?  How many times have I stood in front of the bathroom mirror thinking that it's not fair that I don't look good in a bathing suit?  How many times have I wanted to give up this fight all because it's not fair?

Food may be a struggle in my life, but I am choosing to not let it be a curse.  Sure, it is going to take time and work and strength beyond what I am capable of, but I am willing to work at it.  My struggles may be outward in appearance and are evident to me each and every day, but they are how God is teaching me to be dependent on Him.

So while I may not be able to eat those french fries or that piece of cake or even that simple chocolate chip cookie, I will rejoice in the fact that God is helping me break down my idols of food and build up a strong dwelling place for Him in me.